If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
