I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
