She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
MIDGETS
????
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
