I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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