I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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