Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
