barbara walters just said penis...
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He's a Shit stain on my heart
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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