He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Your cock deserves a montage
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
