Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize