I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize
