I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize