So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
