she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
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