Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
