YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
