I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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