if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
