Duck Duck Cougar?
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
