if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
