i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
