that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize