didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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