I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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