Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
