just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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