She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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