I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize