No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
