Sry I called you an 8
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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