New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize
