My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
MIDGETS
????
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
