we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
