bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
