i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
