your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
