Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
