my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
