Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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