porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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