there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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