my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
