Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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