North Korea, Best Korea!
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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