just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
