So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
