CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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