That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
