singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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