I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Text me some of your sweat
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
