fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
